What do we call this day (and tomorrow)?! “Anniversary” admittedly sounds kinda strange. Celebration … well yes, and …?! And what do we call all the other miracle days spread through these past 365 days?
It’s been one year, today … one year today, that the excruciating pain hit my chest and back. Tomorrow will be the one-year mark of that first of several surgeries to save my earthly life. It’s so hard to wrap all the thoughts and emotions around it; so beyond words.
Last week, in my self-centered whining to Dr. Rudersdorf, my primary(multiple times) surgeon in all this; I was complaining this most recent recovery was taking way too long. His response: “Dan, considering you were supposed to have died ten times in the past year, I think your recovery is doing great! Your most recent CTscan and bloodwork look awesome, and you are indeed gaining strength. I’ll bet you a $-dollar, that in X-number of days, you’ll be walking three miles.” Thanks, I needed that!
To be honest, I am enjoying(a strange word) some parts of this “unwary” journey. Several dear relationships have said things to the effect; “I know there’s even greater things for you to accomplish ahead.” I love the encouragement. Yet, to go even a step deeper in honesty, this journey has not at all raised my expectancy for “greater things“. If anything, it has raised my expectancy of:
– deeper intimacy with those closest to me
– deeper repentance of then-unknown self-motives
– better seeing and hearing into a future
– healthier relationships of love
– better accepting brokenness as my new-norm
Truth is, I’m a broken man. Some of you can relate. It’s actually quite a beautiful thing. Some of you can see and resonate with such beauty(brokenness).
A men’s group I’ve been involved with the past few years, sometimes says: “Never trust an unbroken man.” And so if there is yet to be “greater things” ahead, my prayer, trust, and gratefulness are that it will be in brokenness; and that I may live the rest of whatever days I have, in gifts of weaknesses, broken-nesses.
We are so grateful for you, as you continue to walk with us in all these areas of life in our mutual brokenness!
Thanks for your time and care in reading this update. We love you.
Nora and I are so grateful to have you in our lives and on this journey with us!
Much love …